A Field Guide for Fathering...Manly? Yes...But I Like It Too!

I sat down this morning with a cup of lemon tea and began reading Gary Kleiman's book Pregnant...a Field Guide to Fathering. What a delight!! I was entertained. I was inspired. I was amused. I was impressed. He is a spirited writer with a lot to say not only to dads but to moms, too.

Gary's  approach to fathering is lighthearted yet it sends a deep message: spend time with your children. He writes well and peppers his work with stories of his own experiences. This easy read is a must for every father and more importantly to every daddy-wanna-be!  His writing is totally free of gender bias. He speaks to raising children and the importance of sharing and learning together all life experiences. Read this one, Readers, whether you are a dad, a mom, or a grandparent! You will love it!! Thank you, Gary, for sending me your book.

You can check out Gary's book  here.  So, grab of cup of tea, cozy up in a comfortable chair and get ready for a unique, delightful journey into parenthood!

Gender-Bias at the Goal Post!

This past weekend as I sat with a group of (mostly) men watching the Super Bowl, I was keenly aware of the recurring  gender-demeaning remarks used by men to describe women. The discussions of desirable and undesirable shapes, sizes and sexiness were discerning.

Excuse me 'honey' one gentleman said as he moved in front of me to place a tray of food on the table. Another engaged in a conversation about his inconvenient plane ride the day before. He made countless negative remarks about the 'female stewardesses' stressing the words female and women by actually using air quotes to punctuate these words. At one point he stated that they were most likely too engrossed in talking about 'shoes and jewelry' to tend to the passengers. 

Another discussion was focused on the half time show and visions of accidentally-exposed body parts of an event gone by.  I won't elaborate on the awful comments made at this point. A sarcastic remark was made about the need for a female commentator which resulted in quite a few guffaws from the small crowd.

As I looked around the table I saw businessmen, highly respected in many walks of life. What chance, if any, would a woman have in climbing the corporate ladder under their leadership? Their obvious disdain for and lack of respect for women was apparent. I couldn't help but wonder how it got there? Their fathers? Their teachers? The media? Society? Do they really view women this way or are they just acting out the expected male role? 

As the clock ran down so did my tolerance. I went home feeling troubled. I went home feeling angry. I also went home feeling energized. We have so much work to do! Can we do it? I think we can! We have to!

What Do You Think of Girls In Tiaras?

Check out this video from BraveheartWomen.com!  These well-spoken women discuss young girls participation in pageants. I was amazed to hear one panelist state that beauty pageants are a "feminine type of girly thing"!  Wow!  Is that what we want for our daughters? The discussion is a good one and the question of "winning" or finding value based on looks is addressed. I support the idea that this type of message is demeaning to women. I always have. Competition was discussed and the avenue of sports was suggested as the way to go! Hooray for that idea! One panelist who participated in a pageant as a young girl stated she realized that she wanted to be known for more than being in a bathing suit! My sentiments exactly.  Check it out!

VIDEO: How to Potty Train Your Daughter

Here is a great video from Veronica Baragas of Wiggles and Giggles on how to potty train your daughter. 

How to Shoot a Bow & Arrow Like a Girl

Lilia Stepanova - Click here for another funny movie.

Is Teaching 'Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice" the Way to Go?

Do co-ed classrooms foster gender stereotypes? This school in Virginia believes it does.

This article from CNNam Fix reports that proponents of same sex education believe that boys learn best with competition and movement and girls with low light and social groups. Hmmm...I find that a bit troubling.

No, wait, I find that very troubling! Maybe that is how we have been socialized? You know, girls are all about sugar and spice and everything nice. Seems to me that many girls enjoy competition and movement also and if they don't, maybe they should be encouraged to engage in some.

How can anyone generalize learning styles to a specific sex? I agree wholeheartedly with David Sadker. By separating the boys from the girls, we are only encouraging stereotyping.

Schools that are embarking on differentiated instructional techniques are learning quickly the value of addressing all learning styles and the positive influence of that environment on all.

I fear that the push to involve more girls in science and math fields will suffer if girls don't have the opportunity to develop self-efficacy in a well-rounded environment. They need to see that they are talented and can compete equally with boys. Separating them will give them confidence in an all-girl environment. Will they then feel confident entering into primarily male dominated fields. I think not?

Ugh! All this talk if giving me separation anxiety!

You can read this article and see a short video here. See what you think.

http://amfix.blogs.cnn.com/2009/12/09/virginia-school-separates-students
-by-gender/

Left Out of Leadership!

Today the Washington Post ran an informative article entitled: Our leadership crisis: Where are the women? This timely article states that according to the Whitehouse Benchmark Project on Women, the majority of Americans are comfortable with women leading in all sectors.

The bad news is that women hold only 18% of leadership positions across the 10 sectors examined in this project, including politics, business, law, sports, academia, journalism, religion, film/TV, nonprofit, and military.

This current research indicates that women continue to be under-represented in all arenas in the halls of power, AND if they get there they are underpaid.

The good news is that the 2008 Pew Research Center study found that the public thinks that women - even more than men - have what it takes to be leaders in today's world, scoring women higher than men in five of eight character traits they value highly in their leaders.

A recent report from Maria Shriver and the Center for American Progress, "A Woman's Nation," shows that, by and large, everyone believes that the inclusion of women at all levels, from government to business to our faith communities, is good for our economy and our country.

This research supports the fact that we need a cultural shift that values the unique leadership traits and diverse perspectives that both genders - men and women -- bring to the table, and a commitment to having them work side-by-side to tackle the challenges we collectively face.

So, how do we get there from here?

This article gives strategies for closing the leadership gap. It is a great, thought provoking read. You can read the article here:

http://views.washingtonpost.com/leadership/panelists/2009/11/our-leadership-crisis-where-are-the-women.html

If you are interested in reading the entire Benchmark Report, you can find it at this location:


http://benchmarks.thewhitehouseproject.org/